Okai, so this isn't Lawrence, its Lauren, that girl that made Lawrence his tumblr. What a loser... Anyway, his old shit is deleted and he doesn't know i'm making him one. So like, i'm just gonna tell you about this kid <3. For those of you who don't know this kid's been through a lot. Thing is it sounds like a book was put together since its so surreal. He won't mind much if I put this out on the internet because bitches are too ignorant to find this shit. It all started with a chick named Rebecca, "Lawr Lawr" (like his friends call him for some weird ass reason) was friends with her since he was like 5. They became the best of friends, and about 3 years ago he asked her out. They went out for like a year, and from seeing it myself they were perfect together. I know relationships usually have their odds and ends but this was really something else. They didn't argue, they had no troubles, and loved each other the same way since it started. I'm just gonna tell you the point because this sounds like some Hi5 or livejournal shit. After like a year of going out Rebecca broke up with Lawr Lawr (what the fuck is a Lawr Lawr?) Since she was moving to Ireland and wanted him to get over her before she left the U.S. Some time passed and she got into a new relationship. It hurt me to see the kid in pain, he still loved her, eventually she came back to the U.S., and about two months later she was diagnosed with lung cancer. Lawrence blamed himself since he got her into it along with drinking, and other stuff that i'm not saying since this is the internet .__. .... Like i was saying, another two months later she died, and her mom wouldn't let him go to the funeral since she hated him for some reason. Her dad had nothing against him though, and as a matter of fact, he always went to him for a majority of things. He considered him, or Jack, to be a father, his actual parents are... Well... Assholes. They constantly treated him badly but around other people they acted all dandy and happy. They thought he had no friends, and knew nothing about his social life. Which is kinda pathetic considering he "used" to be friends with like 20 blocks of kids. Girls mostly, time passed by and Lawrence never stopped loving her. Since she died, his friends were there but some of them were Assholes and blamed him for it. He stopped smoking, drinking, and shit just for her, along with guitar playing, and skateboarding since he was too depressed to do that stuff anymore. He still wrote lyrics and chords for her though. Eventually more and more people started blaming him for it, but not his closest friends. He never cut himself, overdosed, or tried committing suicide because he felt he was better than that. Manhattan kids can be rough, and especially the emo kind. Now people call it being scene since most kids in that style aren't actually emo. We didn't stand out much since we hardly even hung out in the upper east side, we usually went to queens and Mineola for the Malls. More time passed by and we started maturing, Lawrence used to cry all the time but now he can't shed a single tear because its too hard, or more off, he's too tough. We stopped dying our hair, wearing the stupid band shirts, straightening our hair, etc. We started looking more like the average skater. We never grew apart though. He changed the most however. A lot happened in between the lines, but unfortunately 4 others were lost because of fucking cancer. Its odd to think that they all died because of the same thing. A close friend of ours committed suicide though sometime in the summer, her dad was a psycho that did wrong things to her. Then not too long ago me and him would mess around a bit, i thought we were going out but i guess not. I got jealous since i thought he cheated on me... He fell for a chick named alyssa, but anyway this ain't my blog. Point is she apparently reminded him of Rebecca. I don't think he ever got over alyssa, he probably still likes her very much but he doesn't talk to her because it pains him. I got jealous, and i'm probably putting myself on blast, but i felt hurt. Word got out to other people. They wouldn't take it. Neither would I, so i told them to go after his ass :/. Ever since, they constantly chase him down and its my fault ._., i tried greeting them to fuck off. A bunch of other stuff happened and he forgave me, which is something he rarely does. All that I've written is just the surface, But i'm just gonna cut it here because some shit is too personal and probably not internet appropriate. Oh yea, and if Jessica, Connor, Lexi, Naomi, June, Zoey, Diana, Andrew, Matthew, Mattias, Adam, Drew or anyone else comes upon this. Get off the kids ass, now you're just doing it because you can. Hopefully "Lawr Lawr", doesn't delete this shit because i just wasted 15 minutes writing this shit. The kid needs to feel free... But that's just never gonna be the case.
“the idea is this, most bathrooms are pretty dirty places. And there’s a lot of people that go to the bathroom and dont wash their hands. And they exit the bathroom, enter the bathroom, whatever. And the handles are dirty. So it makes no sense to enter the bathroom where you touch the dirty ass handle and then pull your dick out to pee. See the idea is you pull your dick out first before you even go into the bathroom. It might look strange where a guy is walking down the hallway pulls his dick out of his pants then opens the bathroom and his dicks already out so therefore he doesnt get germs on his dick. And thats what I never quite understood, is you wash your hands after you touch your dick. I think you should wash your hands before you touch your dick and keep that shit clean.”
Let me down easy. There’s no reason to tease me. If you don’t need me, please let me go. Playing with my dreams? Not anymore.
Time is dancing on my chest and its casting stones. Its casing parts, each one of them antagonist. And I’m trying to feed the wasp inside my mouth. It’s dying! I’m not sure that it wants to live. Oh well.
Hail the insane and deranged! It wasn’t my embrace. It’s yours. Now I’m trying to walk the straightest line. Now it’s time! I wanted you forever and ever. Now it’s never again. Never. I wanted you forever and ever. Now it’s never again. Never.
Oh, how your hands used to shake, tremble and threaten to break if they weren’t encased in mine, telling you that it’ll be just fine. I could have had it forever and ever. Now it’s never again. Never. I could have had it forever and ever. Now it’s never again. Never.
I would have thrown it all away for you and actually did. It’s all around me but I can’t pick it up because I gave you all what was left of my strength.
Love’s a many splendored thing; an often vendored thing. If love was just a movie about war, it’s the surrender scene!
You think you’ve got it figured out? I didn’t say that! I’ve got doubts! I said I’ve lost my faith in love. There’s still a way to find it! How?
I might’ve cared for it at first. Now that I’ve buried it, my thirst is met in bars and not the fake embrace of needy arms.
That isn’t true! I’ve seen your heart! You didn’t see that it was charred? There was a fire, that’s a start. The fire’s gone and now it’s dark.
Please turn on the light. Please turn on the light!
I think I’m still fucked up! Time didn’t heal me! Oh god!
You were a fever dream but you never broke or went away.
